Its 19th century, Russia. You are arrested and as punishment were to be shot for a political offence. You are taken to the scaffold and the death sentence is read. You are given five minutes before you are shot. How would you spend those last five minutes?

This is what one of Dostoevsky’s character did.

Spend the first two minutes taking leave of comrades. Spend the next two minutes thinking. And the last minute to look around you.

Isn’t it the best way? It comprises all the beautiful things about a human life - people, thinking, feeling. I speculate that the last five minutes was a metaphor for how to spend the short life. Spend a part of it with people you love, talk to them, understand what they feel, convey truly what you feel. Spend another part of life, thinking. Thinking deeply is one of the activities that differentiates humans from the rest of the species. You think, therefore you are. The rest, spend it by feeling the beautiful things around you with the sensory receptors you are gifted.

Not Epilogue

If you think the guy was shot, after spending his five minutes. Wait! That’s not the end. So after spending the first couple of minutes with his friends, he attempted to grapple the mystery of death. He thought that he is now alive and after three minutes, he will be something or someone, but what and where? He felt that the sun rays would be his new nature, and he would melt into them soon. He realised how precious life was and understood the importance of every minute. He told to himself that if he was saved by some miracle, he would live counting every moment. He would turn every minute into an age.

And the miracle happened! Just before they were shot, a messenger came and announced that the death sentence has been lifted up, and they were to be given another punishment. One might ask how did the guy, who realised the value of life in such intense moment, spend rest of his life? Did he really, spend his life by counting every moment.

No, if that were the case this story would be found in one of fairy tales, not in Dostoevsky’s writings. What makes Dostoevsky one of the best is realistic depiction of man’s character in his writings. The guy didn’t live like that at all. He wasted many, many minutes. My take away, from this ending is that appreciation of life is an intense emotion just like intense love, lust, hatred, vengeance, anger. All the intense emotions are short lived. With time, their intensity fades. It takes conscious effort and discipline to maintain the emotion.

There are numerous incidents, where situations have changed people’s perspective of life. But I think in those cases, it is repeated recollection of the idea and the desire to change that are the key forces for transformation, not the intense emotion felt due to the incident. To put simply, anyone facing that incident would have not have changed their life as expected. It takes conscious effort and discipline.

Post Scriptum

  1. I loathe ideas that advice that this is the proper way to live life. Of course, there is no best advice. The best advice is not to follow any advice including this one. However, I felt the idea was worth sharing as it brings out the most beautiful aspects in human life.

  2. Dostoevsky himself had faced this situation. He was relieved from death sentence at the last moment. The scene is beautifully described in the book The Idiot.

  3. I badly wanted to joke that I would travel faster with near speed of light so that time would dilate. But I felt that would disturb the mood of the essay.