Another small talk question
Aaron Swartz has a blog titled The Smalltalk Question, in which he tells what question one should ask people at parties to know them. He dismisses conventional questions like where are you from, how are you are, as they are less fruitful. Questions like what book have you read recently, what cool thing have you learnt recently might also not be good questions as not everyone reads regularly and not everyone would have a cool answer.
He proposes the question - What have you been thinking lately for several good reasons. The answer could be about anything - a book, movie, hobby, job, idea, class, relationship. Another good reason that I particularly liked was that it gives a message that thinking about thinking is a fundamental activity for humans. He adds that this question captures a person’s essence, as a person’s thoughts are always his/her own.
I do agree with that. But generally, a lot of thoughts occupy our minds. Ask asking a person to recollect one on the spot might be difficult and may lead to the person speaking out a random uninteresting thought out of pressure. Also, if the person is going through a difficult phase of life, he might have spent a lot of time thinking about his problems. In that case, reminding someone of their problems is not a good idea. So, I propose a similar and a more direct question - What is the most exciting thing that you have come across recently? Here the answer could be a book, a new thing the person tried, a new experience, a new show or movie watched. By using the word exciting we bring out the stuff, which people love enough to share. Also, the person doesn’t have to put any effort in recollecting as exciting things are likely to be in the cache of our brains.
So, what is the most exciting thing that you have come across recently?
Post Scriptum
- Aaron’s blog - The Smalltalk Question
- I summarised a few of Aaron’s blogs here
- The question can also serve well in a Lean Coffee session - agenda less structured meetings. Here is a list of questions for a Lean Coffee session, that I made.